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.. His sister burstinto tears (again!) and ran out of the house. Deciding to make the bestof a bad job, Jake knocked up some beans on toast, and grabbed anothertwo beers (to save on trips to the fridge), before reclaiming his placein front of the box.A couple of hours of waster bliss later, Jake started to feel odd, hisstomach was playing up, and he knew right away it was down to thosedamn cheap-ass beans. Resigning himself to a night of wind, he shiftedin the seat, letting some gas escape as he did. Straight away, it feltodd, and he started, thinking maybe he was really ill, or he'd followedthrough or something, but the feeling quickly passed, even if he stillfelt gassy, and he went back to the TV. It was less than a minute laterwhen Jake felt the need to break wind again, and as he did, he felt theodd sensation return. It was like a sudden shock of pins and needlesaround his butt, which faded almost as quickly as it started.Shrugging, he went back to the TV. The third time it. . um..." Don't be afraid." Mother Superior placed a hand on the young girl's shoulder. "I know this was a hard decision and it's not for everyone, but--" NO! Oh, I'm sorry for yelling, Reverend Mother. It's not that. It's just that my new clothes are, um, dirty." Oh my! How can that be?" Mother Superior placed both hands on the sides of her face like the famous pose in the Home Alone movie. I am truly sorry. Let me see it."The novice's body trembled more visibly now. "Please, Reverend Mother, can't I just get it washed?" Nonsense. I need to see it so I know who to have a talking to."Mother Superior pushed past the novice and walked straight to the bed. She stopped and stared at the habit and then turned to the frightened girl."What's that?" she said, her arm extended, her finger rigid and pointing accusingly at the filmy white stain."Oh, Reverend Mother, I can't tell you." The novice's whole body shook and tears filled her eyes."Did you sin?" Oh, Reverend Mother, how can I confess.
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